The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
