in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
