i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
In America we eat man semen.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize