am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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