so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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