Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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