You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
