You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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