We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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