Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
