Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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