that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
