hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
