my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
