Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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