I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
