the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
smell my finger.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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