Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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