Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
