I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
