we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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