ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
