Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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