Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Fuck appropriateness.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
