I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
