i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
