I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
