i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
