i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
