he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
