I bet he comes in French.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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