My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
