so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
