You really coming over, don't trick.
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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