bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
