If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
