the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
