was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
