So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
