Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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