ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
not ubering you a puppy
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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