so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
