i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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