just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
