One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
