My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
