I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
If I die, sorry about rent.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
