I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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