Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Thank you for not boning my boss.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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