I didn't shave. On purpose
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
