I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
